It has come to my attention that Bon Scott still has not risen from the dead. It'll happen, don't worry. You can't keep that much rock in the dirt (because those are both things on the ground! Right guys? Guys?). I don't want to say that Brian Johnson is a terrible replacement, but he just doesn't have the same energy as Mr. Scott. Plus, why does it always look like he's got an M-80 going off in his mouth? Exhibit A:
Oh yeah, and his mouth is the singularity from the Matrix, apparently. (Insert pseudo-philosophical explanation that would only make sense to a bunch of art students in a New York City Starbucks on a Wednesday afternoon while somebody plays the acoustic guitar poorly in the background).
Then, there's this:
Mum unna highwaynuh hale, indeed! Did I see some cake fall out of his mouth there? This would be really hilarious if it didn't bring up a serious question: will any of Black Ice be understandable, or will it just be a bunch of sweet guitar solos with this guy Wharrgarbling over top of them? If so, someone please give me that karaoke version of that CD. Seriously, though, if I hadn't been able to understand the few times that he said the word "down" in relation to when he said "Highway to Hell," I would've had to question whether they were actually playing the right song.
How much money did Brian Johnson make this week? Probably a lot more than words he can properly enunciate. This is an open message to Brian Johnson: I will teach you how to speak if you give me some money. What else are you gonna spend it on? Seriously, what? Muzzy? Not a bad idea, actually.
While I've got your attention, I'd also like to say lose the hat. We know you're going bald, and you don't need to try to hide it anymore. You'll just get laughed at by the other drivers (ON THE HIGHWAY TO HELL! Wow, am I ever the ringleader of the Cirque du Lol).
-Dave
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