More-Famous Friday

In the spirit of Halloween (why do we celebrate the harvest? Are we farmers?), I decided that this Halloween video needs to be more famous. Freddy Krueger has troubles moving into a new neighborhood, as well as explaining the absurdity of the plots of his movies. Warning: this contains spoilers in case you haven't already seen the Nightmare on Elm St. debacles (I mean movies):

Happy day of harvest/witches and candy.

-Dave

They Don't Make Smell-Proof Costumes

Now, I'm not a big partygoer (I am, bruh, let's drink jagerbombs until we can't feel the inner pain of our empty existences anymore). I did have a party-related hilarity, however. There was a party in a building with biotechnology laboratories in it (a great idea, to be sure), and some of the astronomy club walked over to see what it was about. We didn't go in, but all the entertainment we needed was outside; there was a guy with a ridiculously elaborate pirate costume and a guy dressed as a WWI nurse. They both had their own bottles of liquor. They were both almost empty. They both offered us them. The awkward factor was through the roof.

Then, as I walked back to my dorm, I had to pass 3 or 4 groups of complete bros. You know how some people splish splash too much cologne? I figured they would smell bad, and they did, but it was as though their combined colognes and body sprays and deodorants had a synergistic effect. It was an olfactory Blitzkreig, and we need to get the UN all up in here (do people get "all up in" things anymore?)

-Dave

Sesame Street is a lot more Intricate than I Remember It

Seriously, check out this video of that lady that did the iPod Nano song:


God, as much as I want to hate that song, it is really catchy. The funny thing is that the lyrics to that song are actually not happy at all, which makes the music video seem completely ridiculous. On second thought, all music videos are unnecessary. With the amount of grainy cell phone footage from concerts available on YouTube, what possible use could an elaborate and very expensive music video serve? It seems like the production companies are just getting rich off of this. Did I mention The Sandwich Collective Productions? No? We'll make you an ironically quirky music video if you give us a wheelbarrow full of money.

Oh yeah, and when did Sesame Street get a budget of more than some pocket change? And where did those extra characters come from? We need to get Sean Hannity on the case. Libruhl medjuh conspuracy.

-Dave

Dickbutt

My goodness. This picture is one of the funniest pictures/comic strips I have ever seen. When I first saw this, I rofled for at least 5 minutes. I hope everyone enjoys this picture as much as I do. Not only does it make fun of Batman, but the man's expression to the drawing is priceless.

-Atticus

Kyle's Mom is A B*tch

NSFW - but oh so freaking hilarious!!!


South Park - Cartman - Kyle's Mom Is A Bitch - The best video clips are right here

Who knew that little kids can sing that well? I didn't.
Many of you have probably seen this movie, or at least clips of this movie. Have fun you peoples of the world.

No Time for my Rhyme

I'm a rapper. Physics test tomorrow, so I've got no time for a full post tonight. Enjoy today's Zero Punctuation, which is on Saint's Row 2:



-Dave

The News is Done, Buy Fallout 3

There is no news. In all seriousness, the most interesting thing to me (and thus, the most interesting thing) was the release of Fallout 3. 1UP gave it an A, Gamespot gave it a 9/10 (it's not Halo or Gears of War, so no 10 for you!), and IGN gave it a 9.6/10. It looks really good, but it's necessary to keep in mind the ridiculous amount of score inflation that happens at these places. Remember Assassin's Creed? Yeah, that game sucked after about the first third of the game was over, and yet it got a 9/10 from Gamespot and a 9.5/10 from Game Informer. What? Did they play the same game I did?

I'm willing to give Fallout 3 the benefit of the doubt, though, for 2 reasons:
1. It was made by Bethesda Studios, the makers of my favorite game yet for the 360, The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion. This game was ridiculously good, and is to this day the only game which I have 100 percented (now fans of Math and proper English can hate me!) both in-game and in achievements.

2. I have a lot of love for the Fallout series (we will not speak of Fallout: Tactics!). I honestly feel a lot closer to this series than I did to Halo, although that probably has a lot to do with my personal preference for RPGs over rootin' tootin' shootin' games (this is the Old West and we play games that are on wooden cartridges).

So, while I would be wary of high scores, this also looks like one of the best games of the year. Here's the IGN video review of the game for those who may be interested in such things (for such things shall lead to the end of the Age of Middle Earth because of my ridiculous language choices when I'm tired):



-Dave

The Snow was a Nice Change of Pace from all the Rain

I need to get this off my chest before anything else: even Public Safety officers have a God complex. If you can't be trusted with a gun because you would almost certainly kill a college student or two, maybe you should just shut your mouth and be helpful. Just telling me that the Transportation Office was closed for the night would've been a lot simpler than asking me in detail about what I was doing there (oink). Red tape retardation ftw!

Anyways, here's a quick recap of the day before I make a post about actual news (my life isn't actual news?). The Calculus TA asked us for comments on her teaching style and then got mad at me when she saw that my paper just said "It's fine." She said I was wasting paper by not being more detailed. Because it was necessary to give us all a full sheet of white paper for that. Plus, how much more could I possibly expound upon that? Learn how to take a compliment (I teach compliment-taking on the side).

Second, we had our second (haha, because I used that word already) required advisor meeting today, and I realized how awesome my advisor really is. I mean, granted, he doesn't seem particularly interested in his advisees (cut my fingers off for using that word, please), but he's really funny. He's also very soft-spoken, which makes his tangential stories even funnier. For instance, while discussing professionalism, he mentioned that cursing didn't offend him, but that it would leave a prospective employer with a bad impression of you. Fair enough. From there, he said "I always find it kind of offputting when I hear people dropping F-bombs in classrooms (also a fair statement). *sigh* Frankly, my sons both use quite a bit of profanity. I guess it's just...(awkward silence)...but I digress of course." Yes, you do digress. Hilariously.

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-Dave

Another Member Bites the (Sandwich Crust) Dust!

That means someone else joined and will be helping us, if you weren't quite as clever as I was in coming up with that title (heyo!). Her (holy crap a girl, I wonder if she'll go to the dance with me because we're in middle school!) name is Nikki, and she will be doing a comic for us, as well as any other general post type nonsense that she feels like doing. No subject restrictions, no censorship. Total freedom to explore her inner sandwich hilarity. Let the record show that I didn't say the phrase "her inner sandwich hilarity" in a creepy way, but immediately realized how creepy it sounds. I'll keep it there, though. I do it for the lulz. This blog is coming along nicely.

Here's a picture of monkey cupcakes:

Who are You McVoting forbama?

First of all, I really need to respond to Atticus' post below. First of all, I should say that this comes as no surprise whatsoever. However, ignoring the very serious nature of racism in contemporary American society, it kind of made me giggle (I mean chuckle-boys chuckle, girls giggle. It's in the Chicago Manual of Style, I'm pretty sure). I don't particularly want either of the presidential candidates to be assassinated, but at the same time...I mean, come on. We all knew this was coming. Can someone get him an Obam-mobile? Then at least I could understand why so many people worship him (score Dave: 1, Obama: 0!).

Upon hearing the news, Obama was quoted as saying, "This is the same type of divisive politics that Americans have come to expect from Washington. This is the politics of the last 8 years which allowed Wall Street to flourish even while Main Street struggled. This type of rhetoric needs to be abandoned if we want real change for Joe the Plumber (holy crap, his Wikipedia page has 12 sections already!)." (Dave: 2, Obama: Change) Why did we stop the South from seceding, again? Way to drop the ball, Lincoln. This basically sums up the level of political commentary you can expect from me:

Atticus: kk
Dave: k
Dave: lol
Dave: kkk
Atticus: my gosh

Aaaaaaanyways, a couple of things happened today (I'm sure we all know about them by now) that need to be addressed. First of all, there was a sign on campus that said

"CongratUlations [...because it's a university? It's not a university, guys.] Class of 2009. Celebrate your hard work with a licensed commemorative mug with your school's seal! $20[what!?] See the Student Union for ordering details [how difficult could ordering be that it would require the gathering of details?]."

Right. First of all, the "U" made me so angry I considered starting a LiveJournal to rave about how mad it made me when I was a 13 year old girl (right now). Second, why did they need to include that the word "licensed" in the description? Who cares if it's licensed? I support piracy 100%, and especially the piracy of stupid crap like commemorative mugs. Finally, who wants a mug to commemorate their time in college? I have a hard time understanding the purchase of a class ring, but a mug should be grounds for dismissal from the school. 1 strike rule.

Second, I think I saw the strangest form of anti-rain transportation ever today. Riding a bike? Normal. Carrying an umbrella in one hand and a purse in the other? Normal for women. Listening to an iPod and not paying attention to where one is going? Normal. Riding a bike while carrying an umbrella in one hand and a purse in the other while listening to an iPod and not paying attention to where one is going? Shut up, I know you were expecting the MasterCard priceless joke. I don't sell out like that (I'm such a rebel motorcycle gang). This woman almost crashed into the corner of a building as well as at least 3 people. Maybe tie the bike down and just walk a little. I'm Dear Abby, now. Write me with your transportation problems.

-Dave

"It has Begun"

The first assassination attempt on Democratic presidential nominee Barack Obama was thwarted (love that word) by the secret service today. The attack was planned to happen in Tennessee, and was led by two neo-Nazis. This attack is not going to be the last assassination attack on Barack Obama's livelihood anytime soon, especially if he wins the election and becomes the first African American president in the US.
My response to this is:
1) I am personally surprised that it took so long for the first attack to occur;
2) not only is Barack Obama's life in danger, but the rest of his family's lives are as well;
3) it is a great shame that America is still so backward to resort to this kind of ignorant violence.

To explain my points: 1 - there is still so much racism in the United States, it is ridiculous. I know that in the area I live in, the KKK is a strong group, and are not afraid to advertise themselves, especially to intimidate people. I know that what I am saying sounds racist, but think about it: the very first African American to head the entire United States, this is a huge step. There are still quite a lot of backwards people who feel that a black person should not retain such power ever.

2 - Barack Obama's family is almost at a greater risk than he is, because the next best thing to killing the head cheese is to kill his family. If the secret service is not protecting Mr. Obama's family, they need to start immediately. I can only hope that the Obama family is not injured in any way, if not to prevent the loss of life, but to save the United States from becoming that country that everyone hates.

3 - This is just terrible. How can anyone want to kill/maim someone based on their skin tone is beyond me. This one attack has permanently damaged the US reputation, whatever reputation still remains in tact that is.
Here is the link for those who want the facts, without the opinion. You effers.


-Atticus

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Pile of Money

So apparently there's a new teaser trailer for the new Harry Potter movie making the rounds on the internet. And by the internet, I mean Digg.com. Granted, I loved growing up reading the Harry Potter books, but what is going on in this picture?



I get that she's casting a spell, but come on. She's dressed in all black, has terrible hair, and looks like the Whomping Willow applied her makeup/punch to the face (holy crap, a Harry Potter reference, go tell the 13 year old girls on LiveJournal!) And is she wearing lace gauntlets? And what is with all of the dramatic shouting while casting spells? Shut it down, dear. Warner Brothers, get a new costume department that isn't headed by Lulu from Final Fantasy X.

Also, did anyone else notice the spoiler I pointed out? Holy crap, that building doesn't have a gargoyle holding every bowl of candles (What? Bowls of candles?)! Some of the bowls of candles are just left unheld. There's a metaphor/pretentious artist joke there somewhere. And here's the full teaser trailer:


-Dave

A Garlon Surprise

-Ben Franklin is heckled by drunk men at the Constitutional Convention while Alexander Hamilton (blue vest-like woman's shirt) smiles nervously and Thomas Jefferson attempts to free the Declaration of Independence from his stomach by way of a dagger (as though such an important historical document could be freed in any other way).-

Imagine my surprise when I found out that the first episode of A Young Person's Guide to History, the spin off show featuring the Thomas Jefferson character from Saul of the Mole Men, was online today. I didn't think it started until next Sunday, but I'm glad I was wrong. In short, it was demented and nonsensical, and I loved every moment of it. I know I said I needed to follow a web series to follow(other than Zero Punctuation, obviously. I probably should've added a blog about that on Thursday. I will this Thursday.), but I think I've found an answer to my prayer (I pray to the internet god which is a combination of Thor, ceiling cat, and the Sun. My altar is your face.).

Everything about the show is funny, and I highly recommend it. If I can find a way to upload clips, I will, but for now you can at least check out the show here.

-Dave

Nobody Puts Most of the Internet in a Corner

Whoops, a lot of the internet sucks. I've been looking for a good web series to start following for quite a while now, and still have had no luck. Suggestions?

Anyhow, this post is about bigger problems we've been having. I think you know what I mean. It's the crunk professors. I know, the professors here are way too crunk for me to believe that they earned their PhD.s in anything other than "Yayuh Studies". A quick run-down of instances of HCC (That's High Crunkitude on Campus, for the uninformed. Isn't it cute how I unnecessarily abbreviate things and then have to explain the meaning of the acronym? Don't worry, college couldn't possibly last that long):

Calculus, Monday morning-"guruntee". Honestly, I don't even remember the context here, but it stuck out enough to me that I made a note of it on the top of the page of my notebook. Granted, the Calculus professor is not a native English speaker (...or in the math department for that matter, Computer Science professors teaching Calculus ftw!), but this seemed to go beyond the bounds of her normal Russian interpretation of English words. She also says "arbitrarily" with the rhythm used in pronunciation of the word "habitually". Verdict: crunk.

Physics, Thursday morning-"differuntial". I do know the context of this word because I actually wrote it down, but it would take way too long to explain. Suffice to say that physics is the most ridiculous thing ever. I need to scan a page of my notes sometime. Professor does speak English as his first language, but it seems that his attempt at quickly talking through a problem turned fatal (linguistically fatal...Linguistic CSI starring John Leguizamo). Verdict: crunk.

American Politics, Thursday afternoon-"scurred". This was perhaps the most shocking adventure in the Crunk Forest, as the professor for this class is normally so well-spoken. For some reason, he always leaves his laptop volume on max right before class starts, sets it up to output video through the projector and sound through an external speaker, and then boots it up. Without fail, this leads to a face-meltingly loud concert of the 3 second Windows Vista boot theme song. Normally at this point, he mutes it. On this fateful day, however, technology had other plans. He turned the volume down from 50 to 30. I remember thinking at the time "Why did he hold down the volume button for that long instead of just hitting mute once?" If only I had known. He started class normally and then went to the his office for a pen. Then Skype initiated. JESUS was it loud. He ran into the room and slammed his hand down on the mute button at this point and said "Oh my God, I'm sorry. That scurred me from the other room." After some graduate students peered in to make sure a Skype bomb (Because it sounds like pipe bomb. No? Fine.) hadn't gone off. Needless to say, it had not. Verdict: crunk.

I am just waiting for the Chemistry-crunk connection to emerge.

Crunk is the new Illuminati.

-Dave

Subway Kicks Ass and EPIC BURN

I just got back from Subway because my friend gave me these coupons which entitle me to a "Free Footlong Sub with purchase of another footlong sub and a 32 oz. drink." At first thought "This coupon sucks." But I decided to go for it anyway, I am quite hungry and the flesh-eating gnomes are starting to come out. We all know that those bastards need to be fed nightly, or they will start a coup and try to overthrow their masters: the raccoons!!!!! But that is beside the point. What I'm trying to get at is I got two sandwiches and piss in a cup for $7, whereas if I would've bought the items 'a la mode' I would have spent over $11. Would you believe they charge $2 for the drink alone?! Those jerks.

In a side note, I can no longer avoid playing video games. It has been over a month and a half since I touched any gaming controller with the intent to play a game, but now I crave it. I should instead being studying for an upcoming exam, but eff that! That's what night-before-exam cramming is for. So off I go to play some Guitar Hero and get my butt whipped.

Due to my epic inability at editing online script, here is the link to an EPIC BURN comic.



-Atticus

More-Famous Fridays

So here's an idea I had: every Friday, I'm going to pick out a video from all of the interwebs which should be more famous and post it here. Because this is famous. On a scale of 1-10, the fame of this blog is the number i (imaginary number joke, e-mail me for the address where scholarship checks can be sent for my degree in Awesome Math). Anyways, this video is a parody of the Power Rangers. According to Wikipedia, the Power Rangers changed like 5 times since I last watched that show as a child and the show is now completely ridiculous (the same amount of ridiculousness). Everything about the video is funny, and it was awarded the weekly fifth place on Newgrounds for this past week and was the Daily 2nd place on the 17th when it was uploaded.


Whoops, Newgrounds, your attempt at keeping people from embedding your videos failed miserably. And I made it the same size as an embedded YouTube video. Because I looked up how to do it on YouTube. That's basically it for you, man. That's game over. Make this video more famous.

-Dave

Overeating and leaves

Well, first off, I need to say it feels good to be part of this here blog. To make the sandwich analogy, its like I'm the marshmallow in between the peanut butter and jelly sandwich being fed to someone who is allergic to both diary products and peanuts. Fun times, I know, I was there.

To start off my rant, I was reading news articles and came across an article where a college student was competing in food-eating contest, and randomly stopped eating, threw up, fell over and died. First off, I have never even heard of someone dieing from inhaling too much food, because generally when people eat enough food, they will stop. If not, the gag reflux kicks in. This kid was apparently the Superman of food eating contests, and his weakness was...food...

My second rant of the day comes with my being forced to rake. I am in college, have a migraine, and am buried in enough homework to kill Batman, with or without Robin, and yet I have to rake. My siblings don't have anything to do, but instead of them doing at least part of the job, I have to. I hate Fall because it leads to Winter, and Winter sucks worse than any movie Hillary Duff has ever starred in... that or it sucks more than Paris Hilton does on vacation. Either or works.

-Atticus

Introducing....

Atticus! Remember how I said I would try to get other people to contribute? Well, I did say it. Atticus really is someone else other than myself (existentialists, shut your faces). The Sandwich Collective has eaten another person. Because people usually eat sandwiches, not the reverse. It's a role reversal joke. Nevermind, just enjoy part of the conversation that eventually led to Atticus joining the team:

Atticus: so the online streaming is extremely messed up with the radio
Atticus: i need to talk to the advisor about it
Dave: I stopped trying after a few times
Atticus: best idea
Atticus: but even those who are able to stream, the sound quality is so bad
Atticus: it sounds like garbage
Atticus: literally
Dave: isn't garbage usually silent unless someone moves it?
Dave: otherwise there would be noise complaints from people who live near landfills all the time
Atticus: the sad thing about what u said is i knew you were going to say that
Atticus: i knew that once i said that, u were going to comment on it
Dave: you're a brave soul

Oh yeah, he works at a radio station. I meant to sign up to work at the radio station here, but then stopped caring. I'm too tired at this point to comment further. I'll add in all of the tags for the previous posts by Saturday probably. I know you've all been waiting to get your sort on. Do people "get their (thing) on" anymore?

-Dave

Shameless Promotion of Awesome Music

More people need to listen to Guitar Wolf. Ignore the fact that they are standing in a cave with their leather outfits. Find the album Jet Generation (track previews available here) and listen to it repeatedly. If it doesn't improve your day significantly, then I don't know what will. They're just so groovy! Honestly, I have to watch this video of some guy rocking out to the eponymous song (+1 literacy, pending a rock 'n' roll check) in what appears to be an airplane bathroom, or skylav for short (ignore the last minute or so of video, the editor tries to ruin the song forever):


I know. I just wanna get up and flail around and destroy something while they're playing. If that weren't enough, their live show is even better, as evidenced by this:


Yeah, they chugged some beers. And yeah, their bass player died not long after this. BUT, any band who can rock Washington this hard(as in Ted Bundy Washington, not the Warshington in which John McCain and Sarah Palin are mavericks. Ted Bundy was somewhat of a maverick too, I suppose, but in the other Washington.) has my respect and my props (I don't give props, they're so 2005, right? right? I dunno what you kids do now).

In short, listen to them. Make everyone you know listen to them. Japan, I officially forgive Pearl Harbor because it eventually led to the creation of this band. I'm a diplomat. I need to go destroy something.

-Dave

Possible Copyright Infringement for Dinner

Seriously, though, today's Toothpaste for Dinner brings up a good point: who uses fax anymore? Why does anyone ever list fax numbers as a way to contact them? Other than for the purposes of a black fax, I can think of no possible scenario in which faxing something could be faster or easier than e-mail. Even for physical copies of documents, it's easier to scan them and send a PDF than the fax them. And cheaper!

Working in an office, it may seem like I have a conflict of interest here. Nope. Everyone who has ever faxed anything out of that office has been officially declared ridiculous. Legally Ridiculous 2: Red, White, and Ridiculous.

-Dave

Beating a Dead Weekday (with a Machete)

Michael Bay has performed unspeakable acts on humanity: Armageddon, Pearl Harbor, Bad Boys, and most importantly Bad Boys II. He made Bad Boys II. Didn't we throw everyone involved in the making of Bad Boys II in front of a truck, guys? Seriously, though, where is Martin Lawrence? We need to get him in front of a truck stat (I'm gonna be guest starring on House next week).


Apparently this has been around since June and nobody has started gathering the axes or the torches yet. We have so much work to do. I think this is what the Trilateral Commission has been doing all this time. I hope the economy collapses before this can be completed. Organize a run on all of your local banks to stop Friday the Suckteenth.

Ignoring the video itself, however (and the sound), I quite enjoyed its YouTube page. Specifically because of the fans:

"jason running is BOSS. i cannot wait to see this. looks badass."

Running? That's the most innovative part of this movie? You people are too easy to please.

"Jason running instead of walking has to be the most badass thing going. "

So it's not just one line nutbar (party on Garth!) on Youtube who noticed the running and felt the need to express extreme approval. It's two. This movie will break box office records. There is only one solution: this movie needs to be declared hate speech before it comes out. Honestly.

"awesome!
I hope everyone dies"

Me too. I hope everyone dies. Oh, you meant the movie? There has to be one lone survivor. Welcome to horror movies, how may I be of service?

-Dave

A Beautiful Day in the NewYorkborhood

It has been just barely raining all day. Not enough to flood anything, but just enough to make puddles that are difficult to notice until one has stepped into them. My hoodie is soaked, as are my socks. Apparently it was supposed to snow today. Uhh...what? I think that we left the bubble for autumn blank on the seasonal scan-tron test (I know, right, it's like I'm Mark Twain what with the words and the comparisons and all. Doesn't that picture look like a really terrible Photoshop job? It does.).

In other news, for those of you still following the Burnt-Toastgate, the smell does indeed permeate my room. As does the heat. I am sitting directly beside a wide open window while it's 40^o outside. I should probably take this powerstrip off of the heater before it melts.

Anyhow, the rest of my day is sure to be exciting. I have laundry to put away, a nap to take, Physics homework, an American Politics essay, and then a Chem. review session to attend. The nap sounds the best out of those things. The laundry sounds the worst.

-Dave

They're Bringing Failure Back

So I know I said earlier that the auditorium my Chem. lecture is in smelled like burnt toast. So did the dining hall. And this building I'm in right now. At least the dining hall I can sort of understand, because there's always someone who can't use the toaster.

Why is that girl here rather than in a self-inflicted tricycle crash? We can only speculate. Seriously, though, the heat in these buildings needs to go way down. It smells like burnt toast, you guys (did I mention that? OMG). Put some cinnamon buns on those heaters or turn them down. Your choice.

-Dave

In the Future, Every Bunny Suicide Book will be Famous for Fifteen Minutes

The Story

So I just saw this on Fark and wanted to say this: who burns books anymore? Ignoring the fact that this woman is a crazy retard and probably should not be allowed to hold the life of a child in her hands, it seems like she could just throw the book away without making a big fuss. Or she could make a big fuss.

American parents, get over yourselves. You ruined music, you ruined the internet, and it seems like every year you get closer to ruining books. Most people I know haven't read a book in the last month, but I can guarantee that your attempt at censoring a book is going to motivate people like myself to seek out copies of it (free copies, obviously...torrents for the anti-censorship win!).

I will bet the entire internet that this woman thinks evolution is the devil trying to corrupt our souls with mountains of scientifically validated evidence. I win. No more internet for her.

Edit: Apparently the book is somewhat known by itself (despite the intense publicity campaign of The People's Exhibit A lady), with one Youtube video featuring pictures from the book at almost 140,000 views. It actually looks pretty funny.

-Dave

I Died for Your Sins, Charlie Sheen

My roommate's television just vomited on me. Apparently Charlie Sheen is still considered employable, because he has a show called "Two and a Half Men". I don't know why it's called that, but I'll assume that the kid he was with was the eponymous fractional man. You know who else were considered fractional men? Slaves. Racist (Who is racist? Someone.).

Charlie Sheen is also a pirate with a ridiculously lame soul patch. And a Confederate soldier.
Edit: I guess he's a vampire too, apparently. I'm a professional art.

-Dave

About Us

This is the place to learn all about your favorite heroes: us!


Alex's blurb
Hi! I would say my name, but it's already above this line of text! I'm the youngest writer here. I write about vidjuh games, and I guess whatever I feel like posting about at times. There's not much to say about me. Someone else write their blurbs now.


Atticus' blurb


Name: Dave
Favorite Sandwich: Grilled Cheese
Other Info: I am currently attending college in New York pursuing a dual major in Physics and Mathematics. I write about college life, report on instances of Youtube Glory, and do the weekly More-Famous Friday feature to promote unappreciated internet videos. I also have the only beard on this website.


Svava's blurb

Really? Do I even need a blurb with a picture like THAT?

Anyhow, I'm the resident artsy kid here on the blog. Also, the lone female. I make fun of the terrible art. One day I will put some effort into re-writing this blurb. And I'm going to kick Atticus' ass.

Hello Cruel World!

Welcome to my little oasis in the Internet Desert.

You know, because the internet is dry and spam is the mirage. I graduated from poetry college, I know. This will be an outlet for mocking pop culture, talking about various countercultures, and sharing mildly amusing anecdotes. Nothing side-splitting, but still worth reading.

As of now, I will be the only author here. I'll see whose help I can enlist to make the content as varied and consistently updated as possible. Maybe I'll even integrate a Twitter account here somehow so I can do some minute-by-minute updates from the terrible non sequitur that is my daily schedule.

About me: I am going to college in New York, which should explain my abundance of free time. It turns out that everything in New York is actually a part of New York City. Who knew? You didn't. We are rivals because you failed geography.

I play bass in a band and listen to lots of music. Do you have a demo you'd like me to review? Send it to me at thesandwichcollective at gmail dot com.

Now that Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!, Metalocalypse, and Robot Chicken have ended their seasons, I don't watch anything on television. If it makes it onto Youtube, I might watch it. I'll throw links to any good videos up here as I find them.

-Dave